This present year has accounted for a lot of drastic changes, hard times, shocking truths, and saddening moments that most of us would say, we didn’t ask for. Others may say, all the things that have been happening have been completely unfair. But the thing is, what happens when what is unfair is your reality? What do you do with what has already happened and what is still happening? Sometimes, it is hard for us to respond the right way to the different situations that life throws us. It is very natural for us as people to act and respond off of immediate emotions. A lot of times our emotions and initial reactions are the very things that contribute to the negative result of our conflicting situations. It usually takes for someone to be selfless and  step out of themselves. In other words, a person should  not allow their emotions to control them. 

     My mom recently told me a scenario presented to the parent group she runs.  Their topic was ‘challenging initial thoughts.’ From that they touched base on ‘negative cognitions’ or in other words ‘negative attitudes’.  The scenario was shared and it is as follows; let’s say you’re on a bus, you’ve had a long day at work and you are finally on the way home. The bus is departing from one of its stops and that particular group of people had a woman who rudely bumped into you. To make matters worse, she spilt her fresh cup of hot caramel macchiato on you. After explaining the scenario, the parents were asked, , “what would your initial thought be?” One of the parent participants responded “to punch her in the face.” That was her initial thought. The speaker responded with “ok. That’s your initial thought. The parent was then asked, What if you find out that the woman who bumped into you tripped over someone’s  umbrella and  could not catch her balance.  Would you still want to punch her in the face?” The parent paused for a moment. She then adjusted her attitude and response after  hearing the whole story. Also, note, the woman who tripped and  spilt her fresh cup of caramel macchiato,  waited in a 30 minute line following her long day of work and was just as upset too. The point of the scenario to challenge them to adjust their initial thoughts. My reason in mentioning this is even though the point was  to ‘challenge their  initial thoughts the parent had to step out of herself, consider the big picture (the whole story) and not act on her emotions in order to change the outcome of that situation. I’ve learned that our  initial thoughts about situations, events, or circumstances are usually a result of how we perceive that event.  If our thought about the event is negative, we will have corresponding  feelings/emotions that’ll elicit a negative response or behavior. 

     Over this quarantine there have been a lot of things that could catch you by surprise and there have been a lot of events in which our first thoughts were that of offense. Every time you turn on the TV or look on social media, there is something there that could offend you. In fact, every time you  leave your house there may be  someone that may offend you. A pure example of someone acting off of emotions is the story earlier. The parents response was to “punch her in the face.” This woman was reacting solely off  of her emotions. She felt disrespected and responded from that place. We should start trying to take the high road. Yes, at times it can be hard to do but when you realize that this is bigger than you, you can respond from a different place. Act from a place where the same amount of kindness, generosity, grace, and love you extend to others will be given to you.